For two days now it has been raining nonstop. Those of you who know anything about Arizona know that this is an extremely rare occurrence. Right now I'm sitting in bed, listening to the soft pitter patter of raindrops hit the ground and I marvel at how perfectly this gloomy weather fits my mood. Honestly... I didn't know my heart could heart this much or that my eyes could cry so many tears. It has just been one rough week!
On top of everything else, I lost someone this week. I don't mean that they passed away, but they are most likely gone from my life forever. This person had a strong hold on my heart, and I was extremely emotionally invested. I was so hopeful and believed that this person would be in my life forever. And now I am broken. I miss him.
Isn't it amazing that no matter how many times our hearts are broken or bruised, they can be healed? I keep thinking about the Atonement and that my Savior Jesus Christ felt exactly what I'm feeling while he was praying in the Garden. He suffered not only my sins, but felt my pain and heartache. What a priceless gift that I can never hope to come even close to repaying. But what can I do? I can move on. There are times in life when everything becomes a little clearer, and that's how I'm feeling now. The best thing I can do for myself and for my Heavenly Father is to keep this hope alive in my bruised heart. It may hurt now, but I know that time with heal all. I also know that I need to do a better job of being faithful, humble and patient.
I can almost hear Him speaking to me now.
"Whitney, I know of every challenge and concern you face. I know every thought, every detail of your heart and I can count the hairs on your head. You are my daughter, you are divine and loved more than you can every possibly know. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. I want you to take advantage of the Atonement, to seek out goodness and righteousness in your life and to always remember that the eternities are waiting for you. Let that guide your decision making."
Thank you for your love and thoughts this week, you have no idea how much I appreciate any sweet comments, texts, phone calls, emails... it makes me feel so much better.