"This Whitney Willis character is sure fun to read about," you often think to yourself as you scan my latest blog post. "She makes me feel a lot better about my drama/life!"
HAHAHA, yes this is an assumption on my part, but I'm happy to help if this is the case! As you can tell, I'm a very open individual, and I'd like to think I'm authentic whenever possible. Well, the basketcase has another rant for today, one that is very near and dear to my heart.
I have moderate issues with ageing. Nothing too serious as of yet (I AM 22...) but I forsee big problems in the future. Turning 23 is actually becoming an internal struggle I deal with almost every day.
You see, I had this life plan laid out for me when I was a tween entering my teen years and beginning to dream big. This was a life plan I thought of myself, just in case you were wondering. My parents always taught me to get an education and pursue something you care about deeply. Of course, I always wanted to get married and for some reason I saw 26/27 as the perfect age for that nonsense (I didn't care much for the idea at the time). I knew I wanted a "big girl job," but I had no clue what I wanted to do. I wanted to be pretty and smart and generally a good person by the time I turned 23. Side note: I picked the number 23 because that's how old my mom was when she had me. For some reason I saw this as the "perfect" age to be accomplished.
Here we are. And here I am. You wanna know a really exciting and not-so-secret something? I actually think I've meet those childhood goals! I feel more self confident than I ever have (it may be hard to believe, but it's true), I have a WONDERFUL job that I love more than anything, I have a sold testimony, I have a degree from ASU and I think that generally I do my best to improve myself and become a better person day by day.
It's a funny thing... somewhere along the path I've taken my "BIG PLANS/DREAMS" changed drastically. My testimony grew and my idea of a happy and fulfilling life changed.
The other day I actually re-wrote my list of "important" life goals, none of which included anything career related. Sure, I'd love to be a leader one day (especially in the non-profit realm) but I just know that there are other things that would make me happy.
1. Be sealed for time and all eternity to my very best friend in the temple.
2. Become a mother (many times!)
3. Write a book and become published.
4. Write a screenply and see it come to life.
5. Change lives.
I'm not even embarrassed to tell you that those first two on my list gnaw at me every single day. I think about those future little kiddos all the time and through trials they have kept me going. I obsess over weddings but really about going through the temple.
This is a life lesson I've needed to learn. Heavenly Father gave me the perfect trials and life experiences to let me know what's important in this life and beyond.
I'm ready. I'm ready to get this party started and move this life along. But, you know what? I think I need to learn a few more things first.
I will never settle and I will always, always do my best to choose a path that Heavenly Father needs me to.
I love my life right now and I'm grateful for it! But do you ever ache for something more?
Thanks for listening :)