Do you ever feel a hole in your life?
It seems silly to admit that I do. From the outside looking in, it seems I really have it all. But maybe it really isn't true.
When I was a young girl, I knew exactly what I wanted to do with my life: I wanted to act. But, I was shy, and all hope of pursuing that dream seemed illogical, so I took to writing. I was fascinated with the written word. By the time I was fourteen I had completed a full-length novel and had five others in the works. It made me happy, though I had little faith in my talent.
Time passed and I went to college. I picked a major I knew I would be good at: Journalism. I loved to write, work with people and I marveled at the idea of seeing my name in print. Soon a new specialization emerged from my studies: Public Relations. PR is everything I am good at meshed into one profession (take that how you will). So I worked as hard as I could, took a few internships, learned more about myself and graduated with a BA in Journalism/PR. It was the logical choice for me, a major I knew could take me places.
I can promise everyone who graduates college in this day and age that they will experience some of what I am experiencing now. It's not easy to face a world of uncertainty. It's also not easy to face a world of endless opportunity. What to do with myself? Am I making the right choices? Am I being the best person I can be?
I'm so eternally grateful for the job I have now. I'd like to think I'm good at it. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I'm learning and growing each and every day. I'm blessed beyond reason and maybe I shouldn't be indulging in these thoughts at all.
But there's always this little voice, gnawing at me in the back of my head. Why is it silly to admit that I still want to pursue a career in film? Why can I not sit down and write endless poems, short stories, novels and screenplays like I used to?
Remember to have the courage to pursue your dreams. Defy all reason and logic and be exactly who you want to be. Don't give up on yourself. Don't be like me and cry every time you're inspired by a film or a novel and think, "Wow, I wish I had the courage to inspire people like that." Don't be like me and hide your talents from the world. Be brave, be strong and let your light so shine.
I pray and hope that one day I can see myself in a kinder light, that I can recognize the talents that Heavenly Father has given me and be confident in who I am and especially how I look. I pray that I can have the courage to pursue my dreams, to take chances, make mistakes and never regret that I did.
Latest book study: The Quarterlife Crisis
"All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them" -Walt Disney
"Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works and glorify your Father, which is in Heaven" -Matthew 5:16