Thursday, January 9, 2014

Thoughts on Tinder

So I've been using Tinder for about two months now and so far it has been a hilarious experience.  For those of you who don't know what Tinder is, it's an app on your phone that displays profiles of people around you and you can either swipe left (to say no) or right (to say yes) if you're interested. There are a few pictures, a few sentences about the person and the app tells you if you have any Facebook friends or interests in common. If both of you swipe right, then you are matched and can begin talking privately. At first I wrote it off as a "hook up" app, which it generally has been known for. However, I started talking to some friends and learned that a TON of LDS people are on it so I thought "what the heck," and downloaded it. 

The first few days were sheer hilarity. Looking at what people decide to put down on their profile never fails to amuse me. SO many shirtless pictures. I was also surprised that I started receiving matches right away (hello self-esteem boost) and lots of guys started to talk to me. 

Here are some of my favorite stories

Muscle Man: He wasn't really my type (not into meat heads) but I saw that we had about 50 friends in common and he was LDS. We chatted for about a days about nothing serious. Later that week I went to a party and who should walk up to me but this man?! He yelled, "WHITNEY!" from across the party. I responded with a friendly hug, then he stood back, flexed his muscles and said, "don't I look better in person?" Barf. I avoided him the rest of the night.

Serious Awkward: Again, we had a bunch of friends in common so I decided to talk to him. He got my phone number and called and texted me repeatedly one evening and asked me out each night for five days in a row. It happened to be a busy week for me and I asked him to give me a little more notice. He then stalked me on Facebook, got real creepy and I backed off. I was at a friend's house one evening when HE WALKED IN. He didn't say one word to me. I was so uncomfortable I said I had to leave. Ummmm.

Creep: His only message to me? "Heyyyy sweeeeets." I never responded.

Pretty Sure He's the Love of My Life: I posted about this on Facebook but it's too good not to share. His first message to me was, "I WANNA BE ON YOU!" I responded with my own Anchorman quote, obviously. I told him my brain went from 'wow he is creepy' to 'oh my gosh he is amazing' in two seconds. He said, 'I've gotta tell you, that is a pretty standard reaction to me. 2 seconds of creepiness, a lifetime of admiration.' Then I read more of his profile and realized how hilarious he was. And he hasn't responded to me and so #fail.  

Just No: His first message to me was, "I am LDS too." I didn't know what to say to that. Neither did half of my friends. I read his profile a little more and it was the creepiest thing I had ever read, he told girls that he could give them cute lil' blue-eyed babies if they dated him. No thanks. 

Oh and there was that one time I saw my cousin on Tinder. Apparently he went on a date with a girl from the app and it went well! So there you go. 

#datingsucks #tinderproblems


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